Who among us hasn’t let our mind wander and eventually come upon the thought, “Boy, I’d sure enjoy being Dikembe Mutombo. But beyond being a four-time Defensive Player of the Year and the NBA’s second-all-time leader in blocked shots, what I’d really want to do is perform bizarre tasks to save the world”? I know it’s something I’ve thought of often. And with all those pesky supposed December 2012 end of days prophecies out there to deal with, the thought has never been more urgent.
That’s why I was so thankful to learn that some ad wizards came up with this one: a playable 8-bit game/ad in which Mutombo (controlled by you) takes on world threats such as popular dances by South Korean pop stars all with the help of his trusty anthropomorphic bear friend, all while plugging Old Spice deodorant products. If you somehow still have any question as to whether this is as weird as Old Spice’s live-action TV ads, the answer is yes.
You can play the game, which is a rather brilliant time-waster if I do say so myself, below. Don’t be stupid like I was, and look over the controls while it’s loading. Otherwise you’ll be like me and will start off with no idea how to save those poor citizens from the menace of juuuuuust-different-enough-from-Gangnam-Style-that-no-one-gets-sued dances. Help us all forget this. Allow Mutombo to be a hero again. Save the damn world. (While pissing away your productivity for the day.) And if you lose, you can always yell, “Who wants to vex Mutombo?!” at the screen.
UPDATE: The game above was created by ad agency W+K. That happens to be where Bethlehem Shoals, late of Free Darko, works. I wondered if there was a connection. Alas, there was not:
— Bethlehem Shoals (@freedarko) November 27, 2012
… but agreed.