To all would be motel lobby robbers: take note of this poor fellow in Los Angeles whose plans for financial freedom were thwarted by a couple of mixed martial artists last week.

Video and details of the failed theft after the jump.

One poor field level security guard added her name to the list of sideline personnel getting nailed Sunday. Houston Texans quarterback Matt Schaub was forced out of the pocket by Cleveland Browns defenders and had to throw the ball out of bounds, nailing said guard right in the chest.

College basketball purists will likely complain when Van Gundy’s comments come off as uninformed or too quirky. Instead of bemoaning the World Wide Leader’s decision, though, we’ll take this opportunity to showcase some of his greatest hits and hope the foray into collegiate hoops gives us a few more memorable moments.

When we think of crazy stories involving players we never expected to see on the field our minds immediately go to the tale of Rudy, or perhaps Texas A&M’s original 12th man. Tennessee added to that list of unlikely gridiron participation Saturday when neither of its kickers was available for the game against Middle Tennessee State.

The Angels outfielder claims he was getting ready to do the dirty right before the earth shook Saturday, but his son says dad was actually sitting on the crapper at the time.

Saturday Nights’ GAME OF THE CENTURY was, well…a defensive struggle, riddled with missed field goals and poor offensive play resulting in a 9-6 thrilling overtime victory for LSU. Video of an LSU player’s dirty forearm move after the jump.

One lucky 16-year-old took Olympic gold medalist, and Sports Illustrated swimsuit model, Lindsey Vonn to the homecoming dance.

Apparently one of Michael Jackson’s biggest hits lives on in hockey arenas the world over. Read on to see full video of the team’s carefully choreographed routine.

Cleveland Cavaliers owner Dan Gilbert, who already had a bit of a PR flap regarding this lockout, called on Magic Johnson to provide “a little magic” for his Quicken Loans customers.