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The Bachelor Episode 5 Recap And Fantasy Scoring: Ocean Hookups And Awful Tattoos

Pat Mayo (@ThePME) & Jamie McKay (@_JamesMcKay) recap episode five of The Bachelor and break down the Fantasy points awarded to Clare for coaxing Juan Palbo into a South China Sea hookup, Cassandra unknowingly expressing Communist sympathies and if Nikki should be awarded retroactive points for sporting an awful butterfly rib tattoo. Plus, a tangent into the best Coen Brothers movies. Corey Erdman (@Corey_Erdman) returns next week for a mid-season recap and second half preview of Real World: EX-Plosion…

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Story of the Week – Slate’s Willa Paskin talks about the show propagating, “Callow [and] sordid behavior,” like it’s a bad thing.

Quote of the Week – “It’s a big community and they all work together, we should have this in America.” - Cassandra, at a Vietnamese rice picking commune.

Juan Pablo’s vs The English Language: Round 4 – “Look at you, lookin’ great.”

Screen Grab of the Week – Renne, when asked if she’s really 56-years-old…

Fantasy Bachelor Top Scorers Week 5- Provided by BachFantasy:

  • Andi: 40 points
    • Making out with Juan Pablo
    • Attempting to speak Spanish
    • Getting the rose to stay another week
  • Cassandra: 25 points
    • Getting the rose to stay another week
  • Chelsie: 25 points
    • Getting the rose to stay another week
  • Clare: 65 points
    • Making out with Juan Pablo
    • Getting the rose on a group date
    • Crying on camera
  • Kat: 25 points
    • Getting the rose to stay another week
  • Nikki: 65 points
    • Making out with Juan Pablo
    • Saying “I’m falling for him” to the camera
    • Getting the rose to stay another week
  • Renee: 40 points
    • Talking about your kid
    • Getting the rose to stay another week
    • Making out with Juan Pablo
  • Sharleen: 65 points
    • Attempting to speak Spanish
    • Making out with Juan Pablo
    • Getting the rose to stay another week
    • Crying on camera

REMEMBER TO TAKE YOUR PREVIOUSLY PACKED BAGS WITH YA ON THE WAY OUT

Alli: 25 points
Danielle: 0 Points
Kelly: 0 points (but did properly analyze Clare’s biggest strength in her quest for love) –  “This is the first time having no friends is an advantage”

RotoExperts Fantasy Bachelor Standings:
(Total Points in parentheses)

1. Lindsay: 90 (330) (Nikki + Cassandra)
2. Kristen: 90 (310) (Sharleen + Alli)
3. Jamie & Alex B: 40 (235) (Andi + Christy)
4. Mayo: 25 (250) (Chelsie + Lauren)
5. Kara: 65 (255) (Clare + Chantel)
6. Alex M: 40 (225)  (Lucy + Renne)
7. Derek: 25 (190) (Victoria + Kat)
8. Dave: 55 (170) (DanielleKelly)
9. Danielle: 30 (90) (Amy LElise)

 


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