- Pretty Much Screwed: Why Your Team Won't Win The 2014 NBA Championship
- Worldstar Hip Hop Does Some Bad NBA Lip Reading
- Burger King Made Fun Of A Soccer Player For Being Fat, Might Get Sued For It
- Fantasy Baseball: Kyle Lohse Deserves More Props
- Notre Dame's Everett Golson Excited To Return After 2013 Suspension
Chris Berman’s Mitt Romney Interview Will Also Make You Glad The Campaign’s Over
Well, you know the campaign’s over. If you read my previous post, you know I’m happy about it. Mitt and Barack have dominated my life long enough, and I’m ready for just one of them to remain on the national stage after tonight.
And you’d also know from my previous post that nothing drove home just how ready I am for this shit to be over than watching these candidates spout tripe to Chris Berman at halftime of Monday Night Football last night. Again, you can see the current president say some stuff here. And if you’d like to hear the challenger also say some stuff, that’s below:
- “The more events I did, the more energy I seemed to get” – oh my god he ACTUALLY MIGHT BE a robot
- “Full responsibility for their two Super Bowl wins” – oh great another awkward jokester after Obama’s weird “promises kept” line about the college football playoff (
and also the Patriots have won three Super Bowls total but I guess he’s just talking about the ones that happened while he was governor so there’s that UPDATE: OK he was definitely just responding to Berman mentioning the two Super Bowls right before he said it so I whiffed on that one)
- “the specter of drugs and performance-enhancing drugs” – oh great just great a drug warrior because the war on drugs is so awesome and perfect we should definitely keep drug warring at every turn
- okay I guess the Olympics stuff wasn’t the worst but still he just HAD to qualify women’s bobsled as the thing no one usually cares about didn’t he because that makes me think about the campaign and the scrutiny over Romney’s positions on gender issues and the campaign is ending it’s FINALLY OVER AHAHAHAHAHAHA GOOD RIDDANCE TO ALL OF YOU IT’S FINALLY OVER
So. See you in four years, I guess. With Chris Berman to guide us through the home stretch. America. Fuck yeah.
- Jessie James and NFL Star in Provocative Shoot
- Marcos Maidana Gets Ready for Floyd Mayweather Jr.
- Paulina Gretzky's Provocative Golf Digest Photoshoot
- Former Boston Red Sox First-Round Draft Pick Retires