The Girl On Ryan Lochte’s Lap Was His Sister So We Should All Take A Shower
Man, do we feel gross. Remember that time Ryan Lochte went out on the town and hoarded all the babes from Cullen Jones? That was a dick move, Ryan. It was also totally disgusting, because you had us all believing that the girl who bought real estate on your gold-medal winning lap wasn’t your sister. But come on dude, she was totally your sister.
BuzzFeed made us feel just terrible Tuesday night, pointing out that the girl in the blue striped shirt on Lochte’s lap in the now infamous back seat picture was his indeed his sister, Megan. And we called him a vagina magnet, which considering the circumstances is just about the worst possible thing we could have called him.
As gross as we feel, was Ryan Lochte’s evening one wrong turn away from becoming that scene from Eurotrip where Michelle Trachtenberg and her twin brother kiss? You better toe that line, Lochte family. It’s one thing for a brother to be protective of a sister. It’s another to have the world think you’re romantically involved, which we did for a very regrettable few days.