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WATCH: Brazilian Man With Breast Implants Runs Onto Field, Announcers Perplexed

Brazil is, understandably, in shock after an extremely large-breasted man ran onto the field during the Sao Paulo – Santos soccer match. He has either mastered some new form of pushup, or he just had a baby. Either way, he will haunt my dreams for eternity.

The video, which I’m not sure I fully encourage you to view, shows the man being escorted off the field during the Brazilian futbol match. He looks quite pleased with himself and in addition to the work he’s had done on his chest, I believe he’s had cheek implants as well.

During his extraction from the pitch the announcers ponder his origins. My Spanish is rusty, but I think what they’re saying is, “And the fan is now…Oh…he has boobs. There’s boobs on this man. And tan lines! Tan lines and boobs on this guy. I can’t… I don’t even.”

(Note: that’s not what they said, merely what I would have said in such an instance).

Here’s the video. Again, moobs to the tenth degree. You’ve been warned.

[Tan, Large-Breasted Brazilian Runs On The Field] Deadspin