MLB

Manny Ramirez’s Dreads Cause Steroid Use, Abortion And Gay Marriage, Says Insane Lady

We give old people, those “from another generation” who grew up “in another time,” a lot of slack. Grandpa’s racism doesn’t hurt anybody, right? Here is that idea taken to its logical conclusion: When you don’t check old people’s crazy ideas, their imaginations run wild and soon you have 69-year-olds calling up the front office of the Sacramento River Cats and leaving unfortunate messages.

The message below was apparently left by a woman — who claims to be 69 and “not a fuddy duddy” — in response to seeing a player she calls “Manny Rodriguez” (she means Ramirez, of course, we think) and his long hair in a River Cats uniform.

As with most things of this nature on the Internet, we aren’t sure if this isn’t some ridiculous hoax or an actual River Cats fan, who truly disapproves of long-haired men who allow abortions to take place and hit second basemen in the face with their flowing locks. If this is your grandma, please let us know, and maybe take away her driver’s license.

As it turns out, this woman got the last laugh, as “Rodriguez” was released a few days ago by the River Cats, which is the Triple A affiliate for the Oakland A’s. Looks like Manny is going to have to take his gay-marriage-havin’ long hair and find a new elderly population to terrorize. Especially since he’s no longer terrorizing opposing pitchers.

h/t BroBible

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