Misa Malone performs as part of Beach Blanket Babylon, a San-Francisco-based show that is “America’s longest-running musical revue.” And if you know nothing else about Beach Blanket Babylon, know this: the performers wear some real weird shit on their heads. Stuff like this. So you can imagine if you had no idea what Beach Blanket Babylon was, and were suddenly confronted with Malone on your TV screen wearing a hat like that, your first thought would be: What in all hell is going on here?
Well, this isn’t just a hypothetical. Because tonight, in the middle of the seventh inning during Game 6 of the NLCS, the San Francisco Giants decided that this would be a good time to introduce the world of Beach Blanket Babylon onto an unsuspecting public. Out came Malone to sing “God Bless America.” And she was wearing this:
Apparently the Giants love trotting out Beach Blanket Babylon performers whenever they make the playoffs. And Malone’s performed at Giants games before: here she is singing the national anthem earlier this year. You’ll notice that for that performance, though, she was wearing something… normal. No, San Francisco decided to save the crazy for the largest possible audience. And it was crazy. Crazy enough that when I realized what Malone was wearing, I jumped up, ran out of my room, and frantically begged my roommate, who was watching something else, to turn baseball on. (Yes, he was freaked out too.)
As far as the rendition of the song goes, if you can bring yourself to pay attention to Malone’s singing instead of the outfit and headgear, you’ll notice that… well, it didn’t go so well. She flubbed a couple lines, one to the point where she audibly sighed before starting back up. But if there were ever a time to screw up a song in front of a huge audience, this was it. So many people had to be focused on the monstrosity atop Malone’s head that she probably could have gone out there and sang Nirvana’s “In Bloom” instead of “God Bless America” and they wouldn’t have even noticed.
The hat, though? That made a lasting impact. After leaving my roommate sufficiently bewildered at the sight of Malone, I retreated back to my room. I stayed in there for several minutes, more than enough for the initial shock of seeing the heat to wear off. Eventually, I re-emerged, having something entirely unrelated to Malone’s performance in my head to ask him about. The first thing I herd from him when I walked out into the other room: “So how the fuck do you balance that on your head?”