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NASCAR Driver Sees Bare Boobs In Public, Freaks Out

You’re NASCAR driver Kasey Kahne. You’re walking through the grocery store, minding your own business, when all of a sudden you see a woman breastfeeding her baby right there next to the carrots and broccolis and whatnot. You take a second look, because you’re obviously seeing things. But you’re not!
So, knowing that you’re preparing to drive the No. 5 Chevy in the upcoming Sprint Cup Series, and that you currently star in an Allstate ad campaign centered around your attractiveness to women, do you: A) shake your head, wish the mom in question had chosen a better location to feed her baby, and keep it moving, or B) go on a Twitter rant that includes the phrase “One boob put away one boob hanging!!! #nasty” and call a female follower a “dumb bitch.”
If you chose “A,” you clearly don’t know how this works. But if you chose “B”: ding ding ding! You’re correct.

Kahne would later try to outsmart the internet by deleting some of the tweets and wishing everyone a merry Christmas. Side note: we’re not sure if/when he’ll be able to shop in the dairy aisle again.
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- Kasey Kahne
- Twitter Rants
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