NBA

Why God Why Does LeBron James Want To Star In A Space Jam Sequel? (Don’t Answer That Question.)

I loved Space Jam. Absolutely loved it. I was also six-years-old and thought Michael Jordan had a knack for baseball. It was a shitty movie. The low point of several NBA legends. The low point of the Looney Tunes. The low point of sport cinema. So obviously, LeBron James wants to make a sequel, starring himself.

RT @parletoo: @kingjames do you love space Jam ?(I love that movie. Wish I could do Space Jam 2!)

— LeBron James (@KingJames) August 26, 2012

OK, so take this tweet for what it’s worth. The King is probably just joshing around with his subjects, but let’s consider for a second that Hollywood would actually follow through with this (they’ve done worse, probably in the time it took you to read this sentence) and set in motion a Space Jam 2 starring LeBron James. What would that look like? How would that go? Well, here’s the plot synopsis I’ve imagined up:

For years, the MonStars have been in exile. In unshakeable shame from their heartbreaking defeat at the hands of Michael Jordan and the Toon Squad. For years, they have driven themselves mad searching for the recipe to Michael’s “Secret Stuff”. In a parallel universe, one LeBron James has himself been on a lifelong journey for the key to Michael’s success.

One day on the links, LeBron is sucked down a rabbit hole, not by the Looney Toons, but by the dejected MonStars, who figure LeBron the missing puzzle piece in their jigsawed journey towards vengeance against MJ and the Toons. LeBron agrees to join forces and returns to the Earthly realm to hold a press junket and announce he will be taking his talents — and literally the talents of his fellow NBA stars — to the MonStars.  Together, he and the New Wave MonStars exact revenge on their Toon Squad foes.

That sound was you going, “Ohhhh, of course LeBron plays for the bad guys!” Anyway, no word yet on which current stars could make an appearance. But I’m guessing Kevin Durant is staying away from the silver screen for a while.

[h/t CBS Sports]

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