So, Did “Damn Liberal Socialists” Really Have Illuminati-Like Control Over The NCAA Tournament Field? SportsGrid Investigates!
Remember how yesterday, in our “What will people be mad about?” NCAA bracket reveal post, we mentioned Kentucky not making the field the year after winning it all, but pointed out: “This one isn’t a controversy so much as a noteworthy development.” Well, we should also point out that just because it didn’t strike us as especially controversial doesn’t mean everyone was okay with the Wildcats’ exclusion. In fact, one aggrieved Kentucky rooter came up with maybe our favorite NCAA selection conspiracy ever to explain the injustice:
Chester just called the radio show and blamed “damn liberal socialists” for UK not making the Tournament
— Matt Jones (@KySportsRadio) March 18, 2013
(UPDATE: You can now listen to Chester’s comments here.) Now, your first instinct might be to look at that and laugh. Our first instinct: is Chester RIGHT??? There’s only one way to find out: looking at the bracket ourselves and letting the evidence speak for itself. So, the bracket:
And the evidence (with some help from this 2012 electoral vote map):
1) Liberty gets a 16 seed and has to play a
play-in first-round game just for the right to get destroyed by No. 1 overall seed Louisville. Sounds like SOMEONE can’t let Jerry Falwell rest in peace. EVIDENCE SUGGESTS: DAMN LIBERAL SOCIALIST (DLS) CABAL PULLS THE STRINGS.
2) Louisville – which, like Kentucky, is located in Kentucky – got the No. 1 overall seed. However, Louisville also plays in the Big East, home to the East Coast liberal elite. EVIDENCE SUGGESTS: INCONCLUSIVE.
3) Pac-12 teams got hosed on seeds – left-coasters Oregon and Cal both got 12s, while red-state Arizona tied for conference’s highest seeding at 6. EVIDENCE SUGGESTS: WHO THE HELL PUT LOUE GOHMERT IN CHARGE OF THE SELECTION COMMITTEE?!
4) Three of the four top seeds (Louisville, Kansas, Indiana) came from states that went to Romney. EVIDENCE SUGGESTS: A FEW RED STATES HAD REALLY GOOD BASKETBALL TEAMS IN THEM.
5) In addition to Kentucky, Tennessee and Alabama from the SEC also missed the cut. EVIDENCE SUGGESTS: DLS CABAL HATES THE SOUTH. WELL, OF COURSE IT DOES.
As you can see from the above, we have some conflicting information. At times it looks like the DLS is running the show, and other times it doesn’t. So is the right conclusion to draw that teams are chosen and seeded, if not perfectly, than at least on basketball-related merits? You might think so. And then you might look at this picture of the head of the tournament selection committee, Mike Bobinski, from his press conference introducing him as Georgia Tech’s new athletic director:
Nothing out of the ordinary? How about we zero in on that pin:
And a little closer…
Hold on… just a little more…
OH MY GOD.
Getty photo, by Andy Lyons