SEC country is our favorite country, mostly because people like 46-year-old Jana Lawrence of Dacula, Georgia exist. Jana went to watch the SEC championship game on Saturday, and probably threw back a few too many. So she exposed herself, touched other people’s genitals and licked some tattoos, among other debauchery while at two different restaurants.
A few highlights from her Saturday afternoon journey, via DaculaPatch:
“The female customer confirmed the manager’s account of Lawrence’s behavior and said that Lawrence had been “rubbing” on her and had rubbed her genital area.
Lawrence eventually left El Jinete and walked next door to Friends. The manager of Friends said Lawrence was sitting at the bar with her buttocks exposed. When told she had to leave because she was exposing herself, Lawrence reportedly pulled her pants down even further. The manager further advised that Lawrence had licked one of her customers before being asked to leave.
Two men who had been seated on either side of Lawrence at the bar told police Lawrence had inappropriately touched them. One of the men said Lawrence had licked the tattoo on his arm, the other said Lawrence had “playfully rubbed her hand against his penis.”
Oh, so you thought it was all over after she was arrested? HA.
“Lawrence reportedly continued to yell at the officer, repeatedly calling him derogatory terms for homosexual males and people of African-American descent.
‘Later during the ride [Lawrence] said that she was going to sue me because she had been to prison. [Lawrence] also said she would bury me under the jail,’ the report stated.
Lawrence also allegedly said she was glad to be going to jail because her husband ‘beats her ass’ and would be unable to do so while she was incarcerated.”
The final tally of charges was as follows: sexual battery, simple battery, public indecency and public drunkenness. An impressive evening, by any metric.