I’m sure you’ve never heard of Lisa Ann, because sex is evil. I certainly have never heard her name, but some quick research tells me she’s somewhat of a “porn star.” According to Urban Dictionary, that means people watch her have sex on the internet, and because she’s a “star,” she’s presumably good at it. Her Instagram header says: “#MILFRevolution.” I’m not sure what mothers who are desired for sex need to revolt against, but I’m all for equality, so, #MILFRevolution it is.
Back to the story, though. Ms. Ann came across this sign on ESPN’s College Gameday from an Oklahoma State student, which said: “Baylor’s defense has more holes to fill than Lisa Ann.” Before the game, Baylor had one of the best statistical defenses in the country, so I assume this was some sort of support for the #MILFRevolution, saying that Lisa, while desirable, should not be seen as an object with holes to fill, but rather a surprisingly talented unit with an outside shot at a BCS championship.
After Baylor got destroyed by the Cowboys, however, the sign took on the meaning that Ms. Ann was a whore. An unfortunate turn of events.
Watching on TV, Ms. Ann appeared to think the sign was clever, and posted it on her Instagram, with the caption: “KIDS TODAY! As a sports fan with a clear understanding of the pun, I had to laugh when I saw this today.”
“We need to bling out that sign a bit” sounds like code for “let’s make a sign with my vagina and anus on it.”
People say that college is a rip-off these days, but this proves that idea wrong. You go to school, get a few tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt, make a dirty sign, and then you are invited to join our country’s greatest civil-rights movement. No matter how long it takes… the #MILFRevolution WILL be successful. Especially with great young minds like this one on our side.