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Media MonsterNFLTabloid FodderWeird But True

Chad Ochocinco Johnson Says He’d Think About Doing Porn, So Here Are Some Suggested Porn Names For Him


Chad Ochocinco is now Chad Johnson again. He’s also now on the Miami Dolphins, and he wants to rediscover the crazy-talking dude he used to be, now that he’s escaped the clutches of the evil Bill Belichick.

It shouldn’t surprise you, then, that he said some “ridiculous things,” some of which he may not have literally meant, during his Wednesday media session.

His most significant quote was this:

“I’m always looking to a second job (if I don’t make the team). Thinking about going into porn. It’s not funny. I got to earn a living. I’m being serious. I mean, that’s what I would do.”

NFL.com’s Gregg Rosenthal says “he actually could be serious here.” I agree. Fortunately for Chad, though, he looks a safe bet to make the team, and possibly be the team’s number one threat.

But while it might be a while until his porn career begins, it’s never too early to brainstorm porn star names, especially when we’re discussing a noted onomasticist like Chad.

So, Chad, here are some suggestions – feel free to leave yours in the comments, or tweet them @Mattrud or @Sportsgrid.

- Wide Receiver (disclaimer: only if he ventures into gay porn)
- Hanging Chad
- Dick Goodell
- Dick Tweeter
- Handsy Chad
- Nads Johnson
- Bill Belicock
- Chode Johnson
- Chub Johnson
- Dong Brady
- Terrell Owens
- Mad Chad
- Hard Knocks
- Johnson and Johnson
- Dick Catcher
- Wide Johnson
- Pacman Johnson
- Tim Teboner
- Long Johnson Silver
- Gronk
- Chad Dancer
- Super Bowner
- Carson Schlonger
- Chad Please
- Bitch Pleaser
- Chad Long Johnson (via Evan Sporer)
- Bull Rider
- Cox McGee
- Chad Seisnueve (that’s six-nine in Spanish, folks!)
- Chad Ocho Incho

[NFL.com]



  • Jimbo5

    Nice news story. Possible Pulitzer.

  • Matthew Rudnitsky

    Think I’m a shoe-in. The “Ocho Incho” one probably won it for me.

  • Gordonb

    He should consider acting for real. Not the reality show trash he does now, but serious movies and stuff. Or do a comedy show. He’s cool.

  • Miked

    This dude is funny as hell. He needs to be in the comedy game, like a sports comedy show r somthing..


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