NFLPolice Blotter

This Story Of A Former Titans Cheerleader Accused Of Sexual Battery Against A 12-Year-Old Boy Has Left Us Pretty Much Speechless

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Elizabeth L. Garner, who was reportedly intoxicated at the time, is accused of following the 12-year-old boy into a bathroom and attempting to perform oral sex on him, according to a Murfreesboro Police Department arrest report.

During the incident, Garner allegedly grabbed his penis on the outside of his pants and tried to take off his shorts, but the boy managed to get out of the bathroom before anything else occurred.

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“Ms. Garner, who was advised of her miranda rights, stated that she was drunk that evening,” Roberts reported, “and that she got the boy confused with a man who also at the residence.”

……………… actually, we think we can get a few words out about this part. So… was this a really old-looking 12-year-old? Yeah, the annals of human drunkenness are littered with stories of people making amorous advances they later regret, but not recognizing that it’s a kid? That’s either an extreme level of drunkenness, extreme level of creepiness, or (this is the most likely option) a combination of the two. Speaking of creepiness: how old is she again?

A Rutherford County grand jury has indicted a 42-year-old Nashville woman…

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More on the story below (via NewsChannel 5) if you want to hear more about this, for some reason. Garner says she’s innocent. Oh, also she’s apparently married too.

NewsChannel5.com | Nashville News, Weather

[h/t Deadspin]