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FantasyNFL

11 Fantasy Football Players Who Pooped The Bed In Week 1

by Dan Fogarty | 4:36 pm, September 10th, 2012

Week 1 is in the books, meaning you’re either touting your fantasy football genius via a league-wide text message to your buddies, or you’re huddled in a corner wondering how it went so wrong so quickly.

For those of you in the latter group, it’s more than likely that you have one (or more!) high draft picks who absolutely pooped the bed. Each week, we’ll put these these fantasy bed poopers in one handy roundup, since them being on a list titled “11 Fantasy Football Players Who Pooped The Bed” will hopefully help soothe your pretend football-playing soul. Onto the stinkers.

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1.11. Matthew Stafford

Fantasy Points: 12, Bed Poop Rating: Could've been worse.

If you owned Matt Stafford, the first half of that Lions-Rams game was one long daymare for you. It was in this first half where the Instagram Lothario decided to throw three picks and give his fantasy owners multiple heart attacks. He did finish with 355 yards, but only one touchdown, which equaled 12 points in most standard leagues. Not a good opener for a quarterback most experts had ranked fourth heading into the season.

2.10. DeAngelo Williams

Fantasy Points: 0, Bed Poop Rating: All over the place.

DeAngelo Williams will be on this list for precisely one week, because DeAngelo Williams wasn't drafted high enough to be too much of a bust. But man, if you plugged him into your lineup upon hearing that Jonathan Stewart was out against the Buccaneers due to injury, then he really screwed the daylights out of your team: six carries for -1 yard and one catch for five yards. There is poop all OVER this bed.

3.9. Trent Richardson

Fantasy Points: 4, Bed Poop Rating: Rookie poop.

We all saw Trent Richardson absolutely baptize that poor kid from the Eagles, and yes, it was fantastic. But besides providing that one very YouTubeable moment (and it was seriously YouTubeable -- show it to everyone you know right now) ol' Trent put up some disappointing stats for Week 1: 39 yards rushing, 2.1 YPC, and 4 fantasy points in most standard leagues. He's only a rookie, yes, but a rookie most spent a third-round pick on. I expect more results for my fake football team, Trent.

4.8. Victor Cruz

Fantasy Points: 5, Bed Poop Rating: Pooooooooop.

Victor had a case of the oopsies last Wednesday night, dropping three Eli Manning passes. His final stat line was worrisome (six catches for 58 yards) but his number of targets (11) wasn't. If he can, you know, hold onto the ball, he'll be a viable WR1. For now, though, he's on the poop list.

5.7. Michael Vick

Fantasy Points: 15, Bed Poop Rating: Eagle poop.

Vick's final stat line wasn't too bad, considering he ended up with 317 yards and two touchdowns. Those numbers aren't as good, though, when you realize he threw the ball 56 times (oh, and four of those throws landed in the hands of Browns defenders). For guy who's making Tom Brady money (and went in the fourth round in most leagues), it's pooptacular.

6.6. Hakeem Nicks

Fantasy Points: 3, Bed Poop Rating: Giant poop.

Nicks was dinged up for the Giants opening night stinker against the Cowboys ("Yeeeeehaw, somebody wipe my glasses!") and it showed: 4 receptions for 38 yards meant many a fantasy team (mine included) didn't get the production they were looking for from their WR1. Although, it's kind of my fault for drafting Nicks as my WR1 to begin with, but we're just going to ignore that very obvious fact for now. He "hopes to be himself in a game or two," and I hope so, too.

7.5. Greg Jennings

Fantasy Points: 3, Bed Poop Rating: It's green, and it's stanky.

Good: Jennings was targeted nine times by Aaron Rodgers in the Packers' loss to the 49ers. Not good: those targets resulted in 4 receptions for 38 yards and no touchdowns, which is doo-doo for a guy who many of you drafted in Round 2. (Yes, I said "doo-doo. That is my EXPERT FNTASY ANALYSIS and I'm sticking with it.) Jennings owners shouldn't be freaking out too much, though: that San Francisco defense is quite good, if you haven't heard. Things should open up for him and the Packers' offense moving forward.

8.4. Michael Turner

Fantasy Points: 3, Bed Poop Rating: Old man poop.

If everyone on the planet predicts you're going to be a fantasy bust, can you actually be a fantasy bust, since your fantasy busting wasn't surprising? Yes, if you're Michael Turner, because your ADP was 36.1 in ESPN standard leagues and you only scored three freakin' points against the Chiefs this weekend, you dick.

9.3. Larry Fitzgerald

Fantasy Points: 6, Bed Poop Rating: Not his fault.

This is not Larry Fitzgerald's fault -- his quarterback situation isn't fantastic, if you're just joining us -- but six points (63 yards receiving) for a guy with an ADP of 12.8 is bustworthy. By midseason, he may not be an elite fantasy wideout anymore. SAY IT AIN'T SO, FITZY.

10.2. Wes Welker

Fantasy Points: 1, Bed Poop Rating: Smells like chowder.

We knew the production would go down with the addition of Brandon Lloyd and emergence of Rob Gronkowski and Aaron Hernandez. But we didn't think it would go down this much for Welky Boy: three catches for 14 yards. Most alarming was the fact that Welkahhhh was on the field for 43 of 67 offensive snaps, while Lloyd was on the field for 57, and Gronk and Hernandez were on the field for all 67. Scary stuff if you spent a 3rd round pick on him, which many of you did.

11.1. Chris Johnson

Fantasy Points: 4, Bed Poop Rating: Repeat offender.

Don't satisfied with simply sabotaging one of your fantasy seasons, Chris Johnson is once again stumbling out the gate. Because the Titans were playing from behind, his second half rushes were limited. He finished with 11 carries for four yards and six catches for 47 yards, which is terrifying if he's your RB1. Also: the Titans might be playing from behind a lot this season, which means you might see this movie every week. Fantasy Poop: The Sequel.

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