Fat NFL Linemen Are Complaining That New Nike Jerseys Make Them Look Fat
Many NFL linemen are fat. There are layers upon layers of muscles on there, but there’s also fat. You can see it hang over their belts. But it’s a necessary evil at this point in football’s evolution, because 300+ pound men of pure muscle simply don’t exist – at least athletic ones.
Except NFL lineman are sensitive fashionistas, too, and they don’t want their bellies hanging out so blatantly. But the NFL’s new Nike sponsored jerseys are supposed to be “body-contoured fit,” a departure from the older Reebok style of the past decade. That’s nice for receivers and running backs with chiseled muscles, but the big uglies up front now have their extra something on public display. Let’s hear it from Alex Boone (pictured above), San Francisco 49ers starting guard.
“‘I hate them. They are built for thin guys,’ said Alex Boone, a 300-pound starting guard for the San Francisco 49ers. “It makes me look like I have big old love handles.'”
“[…] When Boone’s wife first saw him in the new garb, he reports, ‘she said, ‘It looks like you ate a small baby.””
Yes, yes it does. Though it doesn’t seem that the old uniforms were particularly thinning either – it’s hard to hide 300 pounds behind a curtain of cloth. Still, it’s not like their frustration is unfounded. Because who doesn’t want to look good while they work?
Boone, for his part, is tired of his body’s misrepresentation.
“Boone, who complains that his stomach hangs out the bottom of the jersey, said it makes him feel self-conscious. ‘It makes me look fat,” he said, “and I’m not fat.'”
Nope, not fat. Just big-boned, right? But seriously, Boone doesn’t actually look that gargantuan. He’s no BJ Raji, at least.