Week 9 NFL Picks, SportsGrid vs. The ‘Experts': Nobody Was Bad Last Week, Not Even Our Cat On A Roomba
Every week, the SportsGrid staff will pick every single NFL game against the spread. We will compare ourselves to touted “expert” Pete Prisco, whom we truly believe is not an expert at the fine, difficult art of predicting football games. He has proved us right since Week 1.
But Bill Simmons, who wasn’t too awful before Week 7, somehow managed to sink below Prisco, with the worst record we’ve ever seen, 2-13. He’s now in last place amongst humans. We truly do appreciate that Simmons isn’t labeled an “expert,” though, like Prisco. By these standards, a penny is something like a “super expert,” with a lifetime winning percentage of .500.
We’re not claiming to be experts. We’re just trying to have fun. And showcase our Cat On A Roomba, whom we truly believe is an expert, but sits in dead-last, even after a spectacular week last week. The cat also refused to pick this week, so a guest picker sits in his place: a Dachshund on a Roomba.
(And be sure to check out my betting feature with lengthy analysis for each game.)
We’ve all done a good job proving my (obvious, yet somehow often not believed) point that NFL betting is incredibly hard, because ALL OF US (except me!) would be down money if we had bet on each of these games. If you bet all of Roomba Cat’s pick’s to win $100, you’d be down $2,480.
And if you didn’t notice, we added one participant, reader @BorganMurrows. Go, reader!
We apologize for not having Simmons’ picks in at the moment, but, strangely, a man who has no contact with us doesn’t abide by our deadlines. WEIRD.
Notes: Point spreads are taken from 5dimes.eu sometime near the end of the week. They fluctuate, but we have to pick a number, and we do. Also, yes, the Thursday game happened already, but everybody had their picks in by then. Mine, Prisco’s and Simmons’ were published, and the others emailed me their picks in time. I swear.