NFL

A Dying Man Recently Expressed Relief He’d Never See Another Bengals Loss

by Glenn Davis | 3:34 pm, September 27th, 2011

Cincinnatian Saul Shuller died earlier this month. A person’s death is a sad thing, of course, but Shuller’s family and friends could take solace in the fact that Shuller lived 95 years, and used them well. He studied piano and electrical engineering before dropping out to help run the family restaurant, which stayed open until 2000 and made Shuller a fixture in his community. He served in the military following the attack on Pearl Harbor. And he didn’t just give up in his later years, either: the linked obituary from Cincinnati.com mentioned that he didn’t know how to use a computer until his 80s…and apparently, he became well-versed enough in iPads to use them for music storage. And he played the piano right up to the end.

These are all details that help us appreciate the life of a man who, according to his daughter, “made life joyous.” But the real reason we’re writing about him. No, we took an interest in him because in addition to his aptitude for technology and music, Shuler was a huge sports fan. And in one moment near the end of Shuller’s life, his ever-present sense of humor manifested itself in the form of one awfully dark, but awfully funny, observation:

Accepting that the end was near, the funny grandfather and great-grandfather said earlier in the day there was an upside to death: at least he wouldn’t have to watch another Bengals loss.

Wow. We’ve heard plenty of Bengals disses in our day (and there have been some doozies; just check this one from The Onion), but we think Shuller takes first place with that line. The Bengals really just can’t catch a break with anyone. Of course, they didn’t exactly go out and make Shuller look wrong: after picking up a season-opening win over the Browns, the Bengals have posted two straight losses. It’s early, but they currently sit in last in the AFC North. RIP, Saul Shuller. For your favorite team’s sake, let’s hope they don’t make your words sound any more prescient than you already have.

[h/t Chris Littmann]