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Actual Tim Tebow News: He Might Be Giving Up On The NFL Soon, For College TV Broadcasting

  • Matt Rudnitsky

Tim Tebow Broadcasting

Life is getting sad for Tim Tebow. We used to joke around about the guy, but really, it’s just sad now. He is a very talented athlete and seems like a genuinely good guy, but he’s just not good enough to play quarterback in the NFL, and everyone with a brain knows it. I mean, the NFL is full of morons, yet still nobody has given him a chance. That says something. There’s probably a decent chance someone brings him into training camp again next year, but we wouldn’t count on him making a roster.

So, this sad day has come. Tim Tebow is contemplating giving up on the NFL, and professional football in general, for college TV broadcasting.

Tim Tebow has hired a sex partner hired a man to partner with a man named Sexton to help him get a TV job ensure he gets the most possible money from the TV job of his choosing, because literally every network will be drooling to acquire him.

How will Tebow be as a broadcaster? No idea. I wouldn’t count on him dishing out hard truths, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll be bad. If he can somehow be nice and give real insight into the college game, sure, he’ll probably be great. The man has charisma.

But one thing is for sure: People will be annoying in discussing his performance (GOSH TEBOW SUCKS HE DIDN’T KILL THE QUARTERBACK WHO DIDN’T STRANGLE HIS COACH FOR PUNTING AT MIDFIELD/GOSH WOW TEBOW IS REALLY CHANNELING JESUS’S SPIRIT THROUGH HIS BOILERPLATE DESCRIPTION OF THE PISTOL OFFENSE.)

As usual, the man’s performance would be uncertain, yet his upside would make him worth monitoring. But as usual, the opinions surrounding him would be genuinely nauseating, probably similar to those “pro-white” comments spouted in my recent mocking of a white supremacist-website.

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