Great news, baseball fans: Bud Selig is “100 percent” retiring next year. Even better news: He’s going to make it incredibly easy — like, awkwardly easy — for you to voice your displeasure at his 22-year reign. He’s going on tour!
“Who does this guy think he is, Mariano Rivera?” you may ask. And the answer is, yes, he got the idea from Mo’s retirement tour and expects to interact with people the same way Mo did. From ESPN:
In fact, Selig said, he would like to spend his last year as commissioner on a Mariano Rivera-type tour of all 30 major league parks, speaking not with baseball dignitaries but with fans and people who work in his sport behind the scenes.
“I want to talk to season-ticket holders and fans,” he said. “I’ve got a lot of people to thank.”
That idea came about, he said, in part because several clubs reached out to him after his announcement and asked to honor him, but also because Rivera’s farewell tour got Selig to thinking about ways to connect with people who love baseball.
“I like that,” Selig said. “I like talking to people. And … that’s what I want to do: [speak to] season-ticket holders, people who work at ballparks. I just like to walk around and talk to people. I love that.”
This is going to be a nightmare. Any informed baseball fan knows that Selig was, at his best, un-involved, and at his worst, downright bad for the game — imagine tens of thousands of said people being told they have an opportunity to make their feelings known to the guy personally, before he rides off into the sunset. How many of the league’s 30 ballparks will this guy have to visit before he realizes those “boos” are not “oooooooh-Bud-you’re-so-great!”
Selig says that if had tried to do this in the ’90s, it would have been “an ugly experience.” What does he expect to be different in this decade? This is not going to end well, unless you like appropriately terrible endings to books and movies. The guy is not going to get the girl (the “girl” here being “the affection of sports fans around the country”) at the end of this one, folks.
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