Roger Clemens, like everyone else on the ballot, didn’t get elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame today, receiving barely half the votes (37.6%) required in his first year of eligibility. While 14 years is a lot of time for attitudes to change – enough time that he could conceivably pick up that remaining 37.4 percent he needs – he’s going to be waiting a long time to get in, if he ever gets in at all.
But rather than dwell on that, the Rocket chose to instead thank his supporters when the numbers were announced. He did so via his Twitter account (which is verified, but has only 25,000-plus followers, which seems low for someone of his stature, even if he never tweets) – well, a letter posted to his Twitter account, at least. Here is that letter:
Okay. Now that you’ve read the letter, there are two things you’re thinking:
Q. What the hell is with that font? Is he going for the Dan Gilbert effect?
A: I don’t have any better explanations than that. Do you? Think he saw how much attention people paid to that Dan Gilbert letter because of the stupid Comic Sans font, thought, “Now there’s an idea,” then filed it away until an opportune moment? Because if he did, it’s working. Our site and every other site that is writing/has written about this letter would not be doing it if not for the font.
Q. “Muchie Peachie”? Is that even a real phrase? Is Roger Clemens just making up words?
Well, if you browse the internet for signs of its existence prior to Clemens’ letter, you’ll likely first stumble across this Urban Dictionary entry. The entry has 17 upvotes and 36 downvotes, so that’s the level of notoriety we’re dealing with here. But hey, if you wat to tell someone their efforts are much appreciated but also want to sound like a parent talking to their toddler while you do it, then hey, Muchie Peachie could be just the phrase for you. Tip for the Rocket, though: if you feel the need to put a phrase you’re using in quotes like that, you might want to second-guess using it.
We’re not sure if Clemens will ever get into the Hall or not, but we do have a feeling that every year he’s on the ballot, he will probably pull a weird stunt like this when the voting results come out, no matter what those results are. He’s got a long, long way to go to approach the internet weirdness of, say, Jose Canseco, but this letter was a nice start. Maybe a mayoral campaign next year, Roger?