The Giants Replaced Home Plate With A Welcome Mat, Which Is Entirely Appropriate

The Giants Replaced Home Plate With A Welcome Mat, Which Is Entirely Appropriate
  • Rick Chandler

Went to pay my car insurance bill at my California State Automobile Association office today, and spotted this. Hey Giants fans, does it surprise any of you that our team has removed home plate and installed a welcome mat in its place? Seems logical to me.

SF’s past four games: “Welcome, friend!” (Reds 13, Giants 3), “Please wipe feet before touching home” (Reds 14, Giants 2), “Come on in!” (Reds 4, Giants 0), “We baked cookies!” (Mets 4, Giants 3).

For those scoring at home, the Giants gave up 52 hits in those four games — 45 to the Reds — with five homers. They’re 11-22, last in the NL West, and have won back-to-back games only once. Talk show callers in the Bay Area are suggesting dismantling the team and doing a total rebuild, which is kind of funny, seeing that they’re technically the team of the decade (three World titles in the past seven seasons).

So Giants fans have actually become … spoiled. That’s so awesome, seeing that before 2010 their most recent San Francisco baseball championship was — let me get this date right — never. And in New York it was 1954.

All the wailing and gnashing of teeth is amusing. The team’s next promotion should be a free calendar, just to remind everyone it’s only May 8. After that should be Steam Iron Night, so everyone can go home and press those panties that are currently all in a bunch. Then of course, Madison Bumgarner Bobblehead Day, because he helped create this mess:

madbumbobblephoto02

Meanwhile, at the Mets game ..

“The thing you have to remember about Muslims is …” “Sir, please pass down the hot dog.”

If you need to contact me, don’t bother: I have Cubs-Rockies tickets

Jim Harbaugh comes prepared with new glove

harbaughdodgers

Who wants to bet that it wasn’t Harold who cleaned this up?

Wizard Cat Defensive Play of The Day

The legend of Wizard Cat began at Deadspin several years ago, when I did the baseball roundup there. Wizard Cat was discovered on a reader’s Facebook page, but soon escaped that daily dress-up hell to rate MLB defensive gems on the internet (see below). This is his triumphant return.

wizardcat001