We present to you this story, which appears to have originated on an old 4chan thread, about explosive diarrhea, a mortified child, and the Charlotte Hornets’ mascot of yesteryear. The story’s been floating (sorry) around for some time, but only came to our attention just recently.
Did this really happen? We can’t tell you for sure, although we’d love to hear from you if you were in the third grade assembly in which this took place. All names (and poopypants) will remain anonymous.
If this story’s not true, though, it still stands as a very strong (and gross!) piece of no-longer-active-NBA-mascot-centric fan fiction.
Click to enlarge, and read at your own risk.