Unless you’ve been living under rock, you’re probably beginning to get sick of all the Richie Incognito bullying news that’s out there. It seems to leak out slowly, causing a collective gasp every time we learn that the offensive lineman is, well, really offensive. Then we gasp some more when we hear his teammates speak so highly of him. Keith Olbermann called it stockholm syndrome. We think that’s a bit over the top.
But the underlying issue is an interpersonal issue that speaks to our vague — if not wholly misguided — grasp of human psychology. Is Martin a wimp? A pussy? Not a man? We think thats a bit harsh, as well. It’s more nuanced than that. The core of this controversy revolves around how we managed our own feelings of self doubt and belonging and validation. Who better to speak on the subject, than an NFL star who struggles with borderline personality disorder (a condition affecting mood and self image).
[Business Insider] “A little boy falls down and the first thing we say as parents is ‘Get up. Shake it off. You will be OK. Don’t cry.’ When a little girl falls down, what do we say? ‘It’s going to be OK.’ We validate their feelings. So right there from that moment, we are teaching our men to mask their feelings, don’t show their emotions. It’s that times a hundred with football players. You can’t show that you’re hurt. You can’t show any pain. So, for a guy that comes into the locker room and he shows a little vulnerability, you know, that’s a problem. So that’s what I mean by ‘The Culture of the NFL,’ and that’s what we have to change.”
Wow. Powerful words. Does he look like a pussy to you? Here’s our take on it…