When Alabama crushed Notre Dame in the BCS National Championship Game, Alabama was declared the champion of college football. Of course the AP still releases its year-end poll, and the BCS its final standings, but both still had Alabama at the top. One computer, however, didn’t.

During last night’s BCS Championship, ESPN’s Brent Musburger just couldn’t help but creep on AJ McCarron’s girlfriend Katherine Webb and mother Dee Dee Bonner. It was a little old-man-uncle creepy, but more laughably harmless than anything. Still, ESPN, for whatever reason, felt the need to apologize.

Brian Kelly has literally run out of ideas on how to stop the Tide from rolling. He asked them to stay put in the locker room for the second half. They didn’t cooperate. It’s 35-0 Alabama, halfway through the third quarter.

Because we’re here to make snap judgments (so you don’t have to!), let’s get started early here in the BCS title game. With the benefit of hindsight, these few early calls that went against the Irish might not even make a difference — the Crimson Tide are pretty much rolling (get it?), up 21-0 in the first quarter. It’s been a decidedly one-sided game so far, but these calls certainly didn’t help Notre Dame. Let’s examine.

Alabama center Barrett Jones is a man of many talents. He moonlights as a Scrabble savant, but his mind is really no more advanced than an adolescent boy. Closely examine his choice words. You’ll see.

14,500 tickets were available for 100,000+ Notre Dome students and alumni seeking to attend the BCS National Championship Game. Daniel “Rudy” Ruettiger, one of the hopefuls, did not happen upon a stroke of luck. So he almost couldn’t attend the game entirely.

Oh, so you thought it couldn’t get any better than a Bear Bryant replica hat? But it can. Two tickets to the BCS National Championship game, that’s how. HOLE-Y MOLE-Y! Roll, you very cute and loving Tide.