Welcome to the NFL Playoffs and Wildcard Weekend! The first batch of playoff games were last night, and while the matchups may have been slightly underwhelming, they still happened. Let’s get into it.

We mentioned this in the morning roundup before, but it’s worth repeating: last night’s Bengals-Eagles game was ugly. The Bengals won by three touchdowns and the main takeaway was that they didn’t look good enough to be a playoff team. And it wasn’t just the players having trouble.

Yes sir/ma’am, a big ol’ shock of a night in the world of sports! We hope yer sittin’ down, ’cause last night’s results are really gonna ‘knock yer socks off’! Are ya ready to dive right on in? Hope so, ’cause we’re not gonna pull any punches, even if ya can’t believe what yer seein’! OK, ‘full speed ahead’!

Are you a New York Jets fan? Worried that your season is over? Well, you’re 6-7, and only one game out of the final AFC Wild Card spot. And, thanks to some favorable tiebreakers, all hope isn’t actually lost.

As we’ve documented time and again, former Cincinnati Ben-Gals cheerleader Sarah Jones is pom-pom-deep in a sex abuse scandal involving a former high school student of hers. After denying allegations over the last few months, she came forward this morning and pleaded guilty to less serious sexual misconduct charges.

The Cincinnati Bengals are actually running the wildcat offense instead of just talking about it. And if this 73-yard touchdown pass from receiver Mohamed Sanu to receiver A.J. Green on the first play of today’s game against the Washington Redskins is any indication, they’re running it as right as the Jets are running it wrong.

Not much stopped the Ravens last night. They beat the Bengals 44-13, making their division foes look rather unlike the playoff team they were a year ago. Thy dominated on both sides of the ball. One person, though, got the better of them.

Warren Sapp, the former NFL all-pro defensive lineman and TV personality with the XXL personality, has written a book. Ol’ Warren is pushing Sapp Attack: My Story pretty hard, with numerous media spots across the country. One such media spot got very weird. The audio, after the jump.

You might remember the story of Sarah Jones, the former Cincinnati Bengals cheerleader and high school teacher who was accused of having sex with a teenage boy… a teenage boy who was also one of her students. Today, she spoke out on the case against her: see what she said after the jump.

According to prosecutors, Webster had sex with the girl in 2009 when she was 15 and threatened to harm her if she told anyone. Video of him being led away after his sentencing, after the jump.