And the world awaits for a Kim Jong-un retweet.

For lack of any better ideas, it seems the FBI is embracing Dennis Rodman as some sort of court jester who can potentially gather some clues for them on a return trip to North Korea.

So those pipe dreams about maybe Dennis Rodman’s North Korea trip paving the way for a new era of relations between the DPRK and the U.S.? Uh, not exactly. But is there still hope if we simply send Rodman back to pacify Kim Jong Un?

The Catholic Church has a new leader: Argentina’s Jorge Mario Bergoglio. He will be known as Pope Francis I. But enough about that: what does this all mean for Dennis Rodman? Nothing good, we’re afraid.

So, Dennis Rodman is at Vatican City promoting a gimmicky gambling site, Paddy Power. Here are their current gimmicky gimmicks and some of their past gimmicky gimmicks. They are funny and controversial.

We told you yesterday that Dennis Rodman was going to Vatican City, hoping to meet the new pope. Well, he’s in Rome right now, claiming to be campaigning for the first black pope. Oh, and he has vacation plans with Kim Jong-un.

You thought you were done hearing about Dennis Rodman for a while? Shows what you know. He’s back in the limelight, and he’ll exit when you drag him out by both damn feet. And no one’s doing that just yet, since the public’s appetite for weird Dennis Rodman stories seems to be rather high… and Rodman seems intent on providing as many of those stories as possible.

Have you ever asked yourself how virtual Mark Jackson and Sarunas Marciulionis would fare on the hardwood against a virtual duo of Dennis Rodman and modern despot Kim Jong-Un? Well, here’s your answer.

Look: say what you will about Dennis Rodman and his budding friendship with Kim Jong Un, but know that he might just be the most vital person to our national security. Not just through his diplomatic schmoozing, however unsuccessful, but his not-so-covert penetration of Kim Jong Un’s inner circle. That’s hallowed and exclusive territory right there, largely impervious to CIA overtures, disguised or not.

If we’ve learned nothing else from this bizarre story, it’s that when Dennis Rodman considers you a friend, he has your back no matter what.