What would the middle of the week be without sordid accusations involving prostitutes and British footballers?

The clip provides just about everything you’d hope for: videogame cut scene-level production value, bored prostitutes, and Rooney kicking soccer balls next to an abandoned barn as he laments the collapse of his marriage (huh).

Oh, to be a British headline writer when the country’s biggest soccer star finds himself in the midst of yet another sex scandal. According to the News of the World, Wayne Rooney had sex with a “£1,200-a-time” prostitute while his wife, Coleen, was pregnant.

One fan in particular took the Queens Park Rangers loss quite harshly, and decided to voice his opinion to the team.

Paul Robinson and Wes Brown are out. Ashley Cole is snubbing Fabio Capello. That’s a bad weekend for any national team that isn’t the French.

Things have not gotten any easier for the Iroquois Nationals lacrosse team that is trying to fly to England for the World Lacrosse Championships (which started yesterday).

The 2010 World Lacrosse Championship is set to begin on Wednesday at the Manchester University Sports grounds, but as of right now, one team may be stuck at home over an international travel dispute.

What do Ashley Cole’s derogatory status message and pictures of British players partying after their loss to Germany teach us? The English soccer team is painfully willy-nilly in regards to their Blackberry use.

The Daily Mail has at least one theory about why England’s star forward Wayne Rooney played so flat in the World Cup: his shaved chest caused him to lose his superhuman powers, a la Sampson from the Bible.

After the Germans knocked out England yesterday in the World Cup, we were expecting hellfire and brimstone from the British tabloid press. Well, today we got it.