LaRon Landry is big as f—. Fast as f—, too. And strong as f—. So it should come as no surprise that his offseason training regimen is, well, being more of that.

Now, we’ve heard of professional athletes using fake IDs before. Fausto Carmona and Danny Almonte immediately come to mind. And that drunken purple teletubby guy, too. Because sometimes it pays to a bit younger or a bit older, depending. In LaRon Landry’s case, it paid to be a bit older. Five years old, to be specific.

Welcome to our fourth installment of Top 5 Dead Or Alive. In case you missed our piece last Friday on athlete horndogs, we want you to know that this feature is designed specifically to make life hell for our employees. This week, Matt Rudnitsky presents the definitive list of swoll athletes. So grab your creatine shake and some whey protein (and some toilet paper for all of the pooping you’re going to do) check out our list.

When the above photo of Redskins (well, for now, at least) safety LaRon Landry took the internet by storm recently, a great many undoubtedly wondered: what is he doing to look like that? Well, now we know a little more about that. Check it out for yourself after the jump.

LaRon Landry has is one of the hardest-hitting strong safeties in football. But, as these recent Twitter photos posted by Landry show, he has ceased looking like a strong safety, and has begun to look more like a strong… bodybuilder? Cartoon character? Something not quite human? Another photo, after the jump.

Barely a week after the Dolphins’ Channing Crowder accused the Ravens’ Le’Ron McClain of spitting in his face during a game, the Redskins’ LaRon Landry faces similar charges from the Eagles’ Mike McGlynn.