Photo via Twitter
It’s a race to the bottom as sports leagues around the world troll after young men just like… okay, in the interest of avoiding litigation, I won’t end that sentence, but you get the idea. From Freddie Adu to Sebastian Telfair to Alexandre Daigle, the road to sports success is paved with the carcasses of “Can’t Miss” youngsters who were washed up by the time they could buy beer. Now, enter Romanian Robert Bobroczky.
Bob-Bob (as I call him), is only 13 years old, but stands 7’4″, or about 1.5 Danny DeVitos. He currently plays for Stella Azzurra Rome, and when I say play, uh, you can decide for yourself:
He looks like a combination of a very young Bambi (the Disney movie, you pervs!) and the aliens at the end of “Close Encounters of the Third Kind” (What? You guys really are pervs!). Yes, it’s a cheap shot to make fun of a likely physical deformity – reports say he’s grown four inches a year for a while – but the kid needs to go home and grow some muscle. A lot of muscle. And anything I can do to keep Bob-Bob from going pro until he’s 18, I’ll do (well, NBA-pro, anyway).
— Azteca Deportes (@Azteca_Deportes) June 6, 2014
If he were to enter the NBA today, he’d be the tallest player, beating Oklahoma City’s Hasheem Thabeet by an inch. He’d also likely be the lightest by a good 50 pounds. And that’s not just because of his age. Here are other young tall dudes that can at least stand up against a strong wind:
Connor Vanover, a 7-foot rising 9th-grader who looks like a beast compared to Bob-Bob.
Marvin Bagley III, the 6’9″ rising 9th-grader who has already received college scholarship offers.
And… well, the list goes on and on
So Bob-Bob (or perhaps we could call him Flat Romani?), stay in school. Hit the weights. Be a kid. Pro basketball will be there when you’re finally ready for it. And the NBA, please stay 100 feet away from all schools.
David Young has been a columnist for Sports Illustrated and ESPN and is now one for SportsGrid.com. Follow him on Twitter @turkeysflying.com.