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SportsGrid’s Definitive Guide To The 12 Best Sports-Related Halloween Costumes

by Dylan Murphy | 2:28 pm, October 25th, 2012

Halloween is fast approaching (next Wednesday!) and most of the parties are happening this weekend, so that leaves you with little time to prepare if you remain uncloaked for the festivities. Fear not! We at SportsGrid have decided to ease your last-minute costume troubles with a few suggestions of our own. Sports related costumes are just the best. Amirite, homeless Dan Snyder?

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1.Tim Tebow Receiving A Media Blowjob

What you need: Tim Tebow jersey (Jets, Broncos or Florida), a football, a bible, a doll of some sort, some sort of adhesive or belt to attach said doll to your crotch, and a sign that reads, "Media" or "Press." Talk about how much fun you're having all night.

2.A-Rod Centaur

What you need: No shirt, a baseball bat, the back half of a horse. Kiss yourself in mirrors at all times.

3.Gay Ty Cobb

What you need: A Detroit Tigers jersey (retro preferred) with "Cobb" written on the back. Crossing out a name and writing in Cobb is permitted. Then walk around with a rainbow flag all night and say really nice things about minorities, gays or otherwise.

4.Old As Balls Brandon Weeden

What you need: A gray beard, a cane and a Brandon Weeden jersey. Then you'll be half as old as old as balls Brandon Weeden. Discuss World War I with your friends.

5.Fascist Roger Goodell

What you need: Belt with the NFL logo thrown on, gloves and a naval cap. Discuss everything's integrity at length.

6.Blind Replacement Referee

What you need: Dark sunglasses, referee shirt, black pants, long stick with red tip. Signal touchdown and touchback at the same time.

7.Homeless Dan Snyder

What you need: Basically just throw these two guys together, except instead of begging for money, charge people for interacting with you in any way.

8.A Giant Anthony Davis Unibrow

What you need: An Anthony Davis New Orleans Hornets Jersey and long, black sleeves to be held out perpendicular to your body all night.

9.George Costanza, Yankees GM

What you need: A Yankees jacket and a laundry list of bad contracts. A pillow underneath the shirt and a bald cap of some sort would be a nice touch. Refer to everyone as "sons of bitches."

10.Michael Phelps-Young Jeezy Duo

What you need: This is a two-man costume, so get a friend and have one person dress up as Phelps (speedo recommended) and the other as Young Jeezy. Then pass a blunt around before you go out and have a built-in excuse for being high during all of halloween.

11.Hipster Islanders Fan <a href=

Hipster Islanders Fan" /> What you need: Really tight jeans and a piece of clothing with a tiny Islanders logo on it. Hipsters and hockey is fun. Discuss your favorite craft breweries and flannel.

12.Binder Full Of WNBA Women

What you need: A suit, a Mitt Romney mask and some binders with "WNBA players" on the side. Fill it with pictures of WNBA players and discuss how much you care about the WNBA. Make sure every conversation connects back to the economy.

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