ESPN will broadcast a record 135 Little League playoff games this year, including all 88 Majors Regional games (going on right now) and 30 Little League World Series games (beginning Aug. 20). Stepping in to anchor the coverage next week in Williampsort, PA, will be Nomar Garciaparra. So like it or not, you'll be spending the rest of your summer with 12- and 13-year-olds.
Of course with this much broadcast time to fill, ESPN will be scraping the bottom of the bat bag for things to talk about -- there are only so many Major Leaguers who once played in the LLWS, and they're soon to run out. And so, we're going to get a month's worth of tidbits like this one, uttered during today's Northwest Regional game between Oregon and Washington:
"We talked about Micah Foskett's passion for Christmas. The other thing he has a passion for is frozen peas. He strikes out here. He eats those frozen peas right out of the bag. Interesting guy." DALLAS BRADEN: "That's a good way to get your greens."
I fold (throws cards into middle of table, heads to the restroom).
Anyone who thinks Little League is the last bastion of amateurism should see how many ESPN cameras are here for this thing.