Dear Sports Fans,
Me again. I remember we had ourselves a little chat last summer when your pyrotechnics claimed various articles of clothing, namely that of Kevin Durant and Dwyane Wade. I must applaud you for taking my words to heart and…oh wait, you burned a lot of San Diego Chargers gear that could’ve easily been donated to charity. Never mind.
Anyway, I figured we’d talk a little bit about what appears to be the latest meme to kick off 2017. Whereas 2016 gave us “Blurry Mr. Krabs”, “Evil Kermit” and Ken Bone, 2017 has given us….television smashing.
We’re not even a month into the year, yet the calendar has already granted us a pair of instant football classics we’ll remember fondly for years to come. First came the College Football National Championship Game, a Clemson defeat of Alabama that no doubt set off celebrations that resembled those the galaxy set off at the end of Return of the Jedi when the evil Galactic Empire was defeated.
Unfortunately, this (presumably) Alabama fan, he channeled a character from the Star Wars film that came after, Kylo Ren, as he smashed the viewing device for the historic game, no lightsaber required, after telling off future NFL franchise quarterback and college football legend DeShaun Watson.
Likewise after the Dallas Cowboys fell in a historic 34-31 defeat to the Green Bay Packers in the NFC Division Playoff, the viewing party turned into one of destruction when one Cowboys fan decided to channel his favorite’s team’s mighty offensive line.
Again…this needs to stop.
First of all, I refuse to believe that this many TV’s are being destroyed nationwide, and not one…ONE…person in any of these vids, onlookers that is, has intervened. The TV, for better or worse, has become the centerpiece of a good number of American homes, a place where we spend a good portion of certain days…like Sundays! And in all of these videos of destruction, I have yet to see anyone react angrily or in shock to what’s transpiring. Is the inaction, perhaps, of fear? Possibly, and I really couldn’t blame you if this were the case in not every single one. Yet, filming rolls on, and no one stops the wanna-be Godzillas from their rampage.
That also gives birth to the possibility that these videos are staged…which only makes it worse.
You’re destroying a TV. One, I presume, you’ve paid good money for. I know this hard to believe, so brace yourselves, but a television is not a basic human right. It’s a privilege. You know how many people would kill to have that TV of yours? Yet there you are, calling the potential top quarterback of next year’s NFL Draft names and putting a walloping on the screen, as if the College Football Playoff committee is going to see that and go “Stop that man’s destruction and give Alabama the title!!!!”
Which brings me to my final point, echoing the one I made at the end of my plea to end jersey embers…it’s just a game, and if your team losing is the biggest problem of your life, count yourself darn lucky.
Look, there’s nothing wrong with being a fan. And sometimes, we let our emotions get the best of us. Blame me too. I’ve never destroyed a television set, but I’ve had my share of outbursts. It was an NFL game, for example, that caused me to swear in front of my parents. But I got over it. I moved on. Destroying a TV prevents you from moving on. It’s an act of destruction that leaves others annoyed and fearful in your wake. If the success or failure of people you don’t even know determines your happiness, to say you need to rethink your priorities is an early frontrunner for understatement of the year.
So please, go back to enjoying your games. Root, root, root for the home team. I know I will. Just please…spare the televisions.