Michael Jordan’s Private Security Team Code Name Is The Hebrew Word For “God,” And Other Things We Learned About MJ In Wright Thompson’s Brilliant Profile

  • Dylan Murphy

Earlier today, ESPN released an online version of Wright Thompson’s profile of Michael Jordan for the Feburary 22nd issue of ESPN The Magazine. If there’s anything you read on the internet today, this is it. Thompson is his usually brilliant self, slashing through Jordan’s hardened exterior and capturing a 50-year-old man struggling with directionless competitive rage and a growing nostalgia.

We also learned a handful of Jordan-ian tidbits, the hyper-control and shameless egoism and repurposed competitiveness – the highlight of which was that the code named used for Jordan by his security team is “Yahweh,” which is Hebrew for God. And, some other things, which we’ve cherry-picked:

-He always thought he would die young.

-Someone used to keep gas in his car to cut down on time filling up.

-He is unwilling to admit that he needs glasses.

-David Stern yelled at him to stop yelling at officials during games.

-He spat on every cinnamon roll on a tray so security guards wouldn’t eat his cinnamon rolls.

-At one point he didn’t know his billing zip code.

-The slight-cataloguing began because he thought his father loved his brother more.

-He’s a Bejeweled Demigod.

-He thinks Joe Montana is a better quarterback than Tom Brady because people forget Joe Montana.

-He thinks LeBron James wouldn’t have succeeded in his generation of basketball.

-A doctor once told him to start drinking so he’d sleep better.

Again: go read the whole thing – it’s well worth your time.