Vanessa Bryant’s Plastic Surgery Wasn’t To Keep Kobe From Sexing Australians, OK?

  • Matt Rudnitsky

Vanessa Bryant “certainly would not want to be married to somebody that can’t win championships.” And giddy with anticipation for the upcoming Steve Nash and Dwight Howard pick-and-roll tandem, Vanessa knows this is not the year to leave Kobe.

How primed is she for the season? Well, the always-totally-reliable National Enquirer suggests that she’s so pumped up that she got plastic surgery to make sure Kobe deems her hotness sufficient to keep her around for this year’s title run. The thought process goes: no champion would leave Vanessa 2.0, no matter how many dashing Australian swimmers may sit adjacent to him at cycling races.

A source told The National Enquirer that Vanessa was starting to feel ‘insecure’ about her looks and ‘would do anything to keep Kobe happy.’


But the Daily Mail looked into the Enquirer‘s airtight SOURCE and gave the other side of the story. It’s a match of the tabloid heavyweights! Britain vs. America!

Her representatives have blasted the allegations as ‘100 per cent not true’ and ‘ridiculous’.

During her appearance at the London Olympic Games, the 30-year-old set tongues wagging that she had undergone surgery after pictures of her looking rather different from her former self emerged.

The Enquirer talks about changes in skin tone, hair, a probable nose job, and “plumped” lips. This all comes from a plastic surgeon they interviewed.

So we don’t know the motivation behind her (supposed) surgeries. Maybe it was to keep Kobe away from Australians. Maybe her nose was getting in the way when she ate ice cream. Maybe she was threatened by Ciara’s “goodies.”

You can come to your own conclusions. And to help you along, we give you: the Mambanessa timeline.


[Ball Don’t Lie]