Reasons We Love The Local News: They File Full Investigative Reports On Missing Mascot Heads

  • Timothy Burke

The Lake Erie Crushers are an independent minor league team in Lorain County, Ohio. Their mascot is Stomper, and as you’ll see in the video report below from Cleveland’s WJW, they take the anthropomorphization VERY seriously. So when Stomper’s head went missing, a full investigation was warranted — but what’s up with the Mission Impossible music? We think they meant to use, oh, Dragnet or Law & Order, right?

In all seriousness, indie teams operate on a shoestring as is, so whoever stole Stomper’s head is a dick, especially given how important mascots are to small-time baseball. If you know where the decapitated skull of Stomper is, the Crushers would love to hear from you.

Follow Timothy on Twitter at @bubbaprog.