Today In Dumb: Melky Cabrera Fabricates Website To Explain Away Drug Test Positive, Gets Caught

  • Dylan Murphy

San Francisco Giants’ outfielder Melky Cabrera, the MVP of the All-Star Game and inflated stats testosterone user, was recently suspended 50 games, as you may have heard. We thought it would end there, with Cabrera slinking into the background after his Brady Anderson-like spike in numbers were finally explained. Well, Cabrera wasn’t going down without a fight, albeit an ill-conceived and fantastically juvenile one.

According to the New York Daily News, Cabrera’s associate, Juan Nunez, hatched a plan to create a phony website which sold goods containing a banned substance, allowing Cabrera to claim that he had unknowingly ingested an illicit performance enhancer.

Here’s more, from the NYDN:

“The scheme began unfolding in July as Cabrera and his representatives scrambled to explain a spike in the former Yankee’s testosterone levels. Cabrera associate Juan Nunez, described by the player’s agents, Seth and Sam Levinson, as a “paid consultant” of their firm but not an “employee,” is alleged to have paid $10,000 to acquire the phony website. The idea, apparently, was to lay a trail of digital breadcrumbs suggesting Cabrera had ordered a supplement that ended up causing the positive test, and to rely on a clause in the collectively bargained drug program that allows a player who has tested positive to attempt to prove he ingested a banned substance through no fault of his own.”

The Levinsons have repeatedly claimed that they were not a part of the scheme.

“‘Sam and I absolutely had no knowledge or dealings with anyone at anytime associated with the website,’ Seth Levinson said in an email to The News. ‘I will state unequivocally and irrefutably that any payment made to the website does not come from ACES (their New York-based sports agency, Athletes’ Career Enhanced and Secured Inc.)'”

Major League Baseball was up to the task, however, and quickly saw through the stunt. So what could have just been a 50-game suspension and a marred season has now turned into a federal investigation. And any time Jeff Novitzky gets involved, shit hits the fan.

“Famed steroid cop Jeff Novitzky, a criminal investigative agent for the Food & Drug Administration, and agents from MLB’s Department of Investigation have begun looking into Cabrera’s associates and his entourage, including trainers, handlers and agents, as they search for the source of the synthetic testosterone that appeared in a sample of the All-Star Game MVP’s urine.”

We’re not really sure what federal investigators can do at this point, but we’d love to read another book about Novitzky digging through someone’s trash.

[NY Daily News]