6 Reasons Why Courtside Seats Are Overrated
In the land of hallowed sports fandom privileges -- golf outings with your favorite player, dinner with your favorite player, dating your favorite player, settling down and starting a family with your favorite player -- the courtside seat is king. Having an unobstructed view of NBA action is unanimously considered a magical experience that can make even the most lopsided blowouts into captivating spectacles of athletic competition. Most of us only experience basketball from the elevated vantage point of a television camera or on a court playing with our diminutive, out-of-shape friends, but sitting courtside puts the game into an entirely different perspective.
Here are a few things you realize very quickly.
1) Basketball players are huge.
2) Basketball players are very fast.
3) Basketball is a contact sport.
As Jason Day's wife can attest, that last one can make the viewing experience vastly less fun. On Thursday night, Ellie Day was crushed by all 250 pounds of LeBron James as he dove into the front row to save a ball. Her head and neck hit the ground behind her seat with such force that had to be stretchered off in a neckbrace and transported to a hospital. We know those to have been precautionary measures, as she's issued a statement saying she's fine (below), but that doesn't change the reality that courtside seats aren't all they're cracked up to be. In fact, they're kind of overrated.
Wow!! It’s official. More messages from getting plowed over by Lebron than Jason winning a major. HA.
First of all, I am okay!! I am incredibly sore and exhausted. Being tackled by that large man I would compare to a minor car accident. My head and neck hit pretty hard so it was really scary. My whole body feels like it was hit by a truck.
Second, it was so fast. I didn’t remember until 2am seeing the ball come toward me. It was a blur. To the crazies that think Jason should have protected me— if he had time to react, so would have I. Also, I would not have liked both dudes landing on me. Lebron is huge and had such momentum he could not have stopped!!
Third, people are saying its a money grab or some crap which is obviously absurd. Much like attending a golf event and risking getting hit with a ball, sitting court side you risk getting run into. I would never make anything more of it. They’re huge men doing their job. I was stabilized because I smashed my neck and head and obviously it was with great force.
Last, I am truly touched by the insane outpouring of support and those of you covering me in prayer. It could have been so much worse. I am thankful for so many things. One, that I didn’t have Lucy on my chest in her carrier, and that I wasn’t still pregnant. Also that Dash wasn’t with us. Also that Amy had my babies and got them to me at the hospital so I could feed little Lucy. It was my biggest concern when I came out of it. And that’s the end of my story. *^_^*
Much love to all of you ❤
Below are six other facts you may not know about courtside seats that prove they're not as amazing as you might think...
6) YOU LOSE THE FREEDOM TO PICK THE EXPENSIVE DESIGNER DRUGS OUT OF YOUR NOSE, LEST YOU WANT DEADSPIN'S TIM BURKE TO PUBLISH AN EMBARRASSING SCREENSHOT OF THE MOMENT YOUR FINGER REACHES ITS FURTHEST POINT INSIDE NOSTRIL.
5) STADIUM SECURITY ALLOW YOU TO LEAVE YOUR SEAT ONLY DURING STOPPAGES OF PLAY, WHICH MAY SOUND LIKE AN INVITATION FOR YOU TO THROW YOUR ENTRÉE ONTO THE COURT AND SCREAM "TIMEOUT TIMEOUT I HAVE TO PEE, OH MY GOD!", BUT IT'S NOT. YOU HAVE TO WAIT, WHICH IS BAD.
4) PLAYERS RUDELY SCOFF WHEN YOU ASK THEM FOR A REFILL ON YOUR CITRON AND SODA, EVEN WHEN THEY'RE JUST STANDING AROUND DURING FREE THROWS.
3) THEY ONLY LET YOU SHOOT AROUND IN BETWEEN QUARTERS BUT NOT DURING TIMEOUTS, LIKE THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO.
2) YOU CAN'T BRING YOUR SMALL DOG, WHICH IS BULLSHIT.
1) JACK NICHOLSON SMELLS LIKE WEIRD SPICES AND SPIKE LEE NEVER EVER EVER ASKS HOW YOUR DAY WAS!
Heed my advice and save yourself the hassle and the money. It's not worth it.
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