As The NBA Bans LeBron’s Black Mask, D-Wade Gets Off Scot-Free With This White Spandex Onesie

  • Jake O'Donnell

Whether you liked it or not, you’ve got to admit LeBron’s Hannibal Lector-Eyes Wide Shut-Batman-Zorro-Darth Vader mask was pretty damn intimidating. Maybe that’s why this had to happen:

Ugh, now we’ve got to watch him ball in a creepy clear mask? The Gary Oldman one from “The 5th Element”? Who makes these decisions and can they please hand down a ruling on Dwayne Wade’s Cirque de Soliel spring cycling collection?

Wade and LeBron (who was only wearing a helmet, no mask) participated in a Miami “Critical Mass” event, whereby wheel-enthusiasts take to the streets on the last Friday of every month, and travel en masse at a cruising speed of 12 mph — a speed you might say DOES NOT warrant a “Tron” suit.