Blake Griffin hasn't played in a game since Christmas, after injuring his quad playing basketball and injuring his hand punching a friend outside a Benihana (I assume). Classic, right? Here's an even more cliche story: the 6'10" power forward has a ginormous weiner.
For reals, that was the B plot of Wednesday night's "Broad City" (which you can watch in its entirety, here). Alana meets Griffin in a club, tells him she "wanna climb a the beanstalk," goes home with him, realizes that he's packing a can of tennis balls, then recaps her hook-up with Abbi, saying "he fingered me a bunch" and that she gave one of his sneakers to her quasi-boyfriend played by Hannibal Buress (who uses the shoe as a man purse).
Griffin is slated to return from his four-game suspension on Sunday against the Wizards.
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