Fab Melo Was Called Up By The Celtics, But Only Because He Concussed Himself By Walking Into A Door

  • Jordan Rabinowitz

Celtics fans who wait with bated breath for someone to come help Kevin Garnett in the frontcourt might have been a little misled by the information that seven-footer Fab Melo has been called up from the Maine Red Claws of the D-League. The 22nd overall pick of the 2012 Draft is not about to suit up Celtics green, but rather in a hospital gown.

You see, Melo, the same guy that was suspended from the NCAA tournament by his own team because of academic shortcomings, sustained a concussion by running into a hotel room door. And in order to receive treatment from a team’s medical staff, the rules state a player actually has to be on said parent team’s roster. Apparently Melo smacked the top of his head on the hinge of a double door, which I guess isn’t that hard to do when you’re that tall, but still, this seems like one of those injuries that should never ever happen.

Doorway awareness. Such an underrated quality in a person. Of course, Doc Rivers had some fun at Melo’s expense. It was all very funny, unlike the sub-.500 Celtics and Doc’s shitty frontcourt.

Before sustaining the world’s worst concussion, Melo had played 12 games for the Red Claws, averaging a steady 10.9 points and 6.9 rebounds a contest, and an impressive 3.84 blocks a game. That included a gnarly 15-point, 16-rebound, 14-block game against Erie on Dec. 22. As for his NBA prospects, GM Danny Ainge seems intent on letting him get extended time in the D-League, but both he and Rivers indicated he would see time in Boston before season’s end.

Naturally, that involves not being concussed because you ran into a door, you Brazilian Manny Ramirez, you.

[via The Nosebleeds, Getty Images]