Have You Ever Wondered How NBA Players Keep Their Wives Away From Their Girlfriends At Games? Jalen Rose Explains.

  • Matt Rudnitsky

Have you ever wondered how Carmelo Anthony keeps his Honey Nuts Cheerios away from his Cocoa Puffs, Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Count Chocula (or whatever he’s into)? An NBA player’s cereals will fight if combined into one bowl, and that would be bad for Carmelo, and other NBA players, most of whom love a variety of cereals, despite their public allegiance to one particular brand. As he often does, ex-NBAer Jalen Rose explains these taboo activities on Grantland’s YouTube channel, to Bill Simmons and David Jacoby.

This is why Derek Jeter, unashamed, single playboy, is lauded for his “character.” The man understands that with such a delicious variety of cereals throwing themselves at him, he is unable to stick to just one, even if it is as consistently solid as Honey Nut Cheerios. Especially when your lifetime supply of cereals is available free of cost (unless you are Frank Ribéry, alleged underage cereal-purchaser).

Note: Cereals are girls, guys.