Kobe Bryant Would Have “Smacked The Hell Out Of” Mike Rice If He Was Subjected To The Rutgers Coach’s Bullying

  • Matt Rudnitsky

A common response to the “Mike Rice hurls balls and gay slurs at Rutgers basketball players and is generally a horrible person” scandal was this: why didn’t these massive, freakish athletes fight back? Fear of getting in trouble is the likely answer, but it’s still a bit surprising that nobody, say, smacked the hell out of him. You don’t think any 18-year-old alpha males would have snapped and smacked the hell out of him?

18-year-old Kobe Bryant, alpha male of the alpha males, would have smacked the hell out of him.

Kobe Bryant smacked the hell out of the Trail Blazers last night, and the Lakers have a legitimate chance of making the playoffs and making me look stupid.