L.A. can’t hold Dwight Howard, and apparently, neither can 140 characters. This is how he put it out there when he finally decided where to bring his circus next (on TwitLonger, mind you — might as well just email everyone on Earth).
@DwightHoward: “I’ve decided to become a member of the Houston Rockets. I feel its the best place for me and I am excited about joining the Rockets and I’m looking forward to a great season. I want to thank the fans in Los Angeles and wish them the best.”
Great. Pack up the cameras. Shows over. Get in the van. We’re going somewhere else to cover some actual ne…wait, what’s that? Kobe unfollowed Dwight on Twitter? Annnnnd he has a rebuttal prepared on Instagram?
Ok, get out of the truck. Sorry, Kobe’s gonna be a dick we have to get this on tape…
Well, that wasn’t too bad, now was it? That could’ve been waaaay worse. Little if no inuendo. A whopping zero ass references. And no signs of the effects of powerful post surgery sedatives (BEARS!). Though there was a “#vino” reference, which, when accompanied with an Instagramed sensual embrace between he and Pau Gasol, one could assume the two are drunk on love, sharing a big plate of spaghetti and meatballs out back of an old Italian restaurant.
I wonder who gets the last meatball? Is Kobe playfully nudging it over to Pau with his nose? Or the other way around? Either way, Dwight’s not even getting any “vino”, as Mamba’s “corazon” clearly belongs to only one big. Bellissima!