Michael Jordan’s Courtroom Sketch Is Also Hilarious
Jake ODonnell 03:50 pm, August 18th, 2015
When are we just going to come to grips with the fact that all courtroom sketches are ridiculous-looking and, thus, not that funny? Answer: never. They'll always be hilarious -- especially when you're talking about hastily drawn pictures of the most famous athletes on Earth nervously sitting in a wooden box.
In Michael Jordan's case, there's an added level of irony, as he was in a Chicago courtroom today suing a defunct grocery store chain for using his likeness in an ad back in 2009. He claims the store (Dominick's) damaged his brand by running this in a local newspaper to sell steaks without his consent. No joke.
"My image," Jordan said today. "[Is] something I value very preciously," adding that he doesn't do media deals for less that $10 million for some reason.
Um, dude, we get the whole "your image is your brand" argument, but have you seen the pictures currently being drawn of you courtroom sketch artists? They've got you looking like a Star Trek character. At what point are you just going to give up and realize people aren't judging you based on someone else's usage of your "likeness"? Hell, one of them even gave you a giant earring. How silly is that? You're 52-year-old billionaire. Why would someone give you pirate jewelr...oh wait, he actually has a giant pirate earing?
K, nevermind. That makes these slightly less stupid then.