The Most Pitiful Dunk Attempt Ever? (Video)

  • Barry Rothbard

Andray Blatche had a wide open path to the hoop early on in last night’s Wizards-Bulls game… and promptly did something “Andray Blatche-y” (that’s shorthand for “crapping the bed and blowing a two-handed dunk”).

Blatche (3-14 on the night) was also whistled for one of three Washington technical fouls in the second half. Needless to say, the Wizards lost the game, though they were within two points in the final minute.

Blatche’s quote: “After that layup, I knew it was going to be a long night — and it was.”

Blatche (who also got one of the Wizards’ three technical fouls) is, simply put, the worst player in the NBA to ever average 16.8 ppg and 7.7 rpg. Look at his eyes/demeanor/body language when he plays–there’s something off. Or, as Jason Whitlock astutely pointed out during the Wizards’ choke job last week against the Heat, Blatche is not the sharpest tool in the NBA’s shed.

And really, what else would we expect from a man whose pumps Gilbert Arenas defecated in? What else would we expect from a man who wanted a triple-double so badly he begged Yi to let him get a rebound? Nothing else. This has become Blatche’s role: like Trinculo or Touchstone, Blatche has become one of the NBA’s Shakespearean fools.

On the court, he’s just as bumbling as he is off it. According to John Hollinger‘s PER stats (Insider only), Blatche is the 144th most efficient player in the NBA. That’s being generous.