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ESPN Has Lonzo And LaVar Ball On ‘First Take’ (Again), Talks About Himself

ESPN Has Lonzo And LaVar Ball On ‘First Take’ (Again), Talks About Himself
  • Jake O'Donnell

In a weekend with some surprising basketball-related moments (ahem, the Kentucky-UNC finish), UCLA Freshman Lonzo Ball unsurprisingly declared for the 2017 NBA Draft. Duh. Of course. Even less surprising, however, was the following footage that surfaced showing his father, LaVar, running around a basketball court like the crazed homeless dude who wandered into your playground pickup game.

Yep, that’s right. The man who famously declared he could beat both Charles Barkley and Michael Jordan one-on-one is, objectively, total garbage.

Now that that mystery has been solved, let’s have a look at Mr. Ball’s much anticipated second sit down with ESPN’s flagship firebrand, Stephen A. Smith. You might not be shocked that he managed to say some [drumroll] dumb shit.

So, LaVar, what did you think as a rival five-star, future lottery pick scored 29 more points than your son, prematurely ending his college basketball career?

“As the game was unfolding, I was saying, Stephen A. Smith is going to go crazy when we lose this game. That’s all I thought.”

Ok. I think the rest of us thought, “Wow, De’Aaron Fox just made LaVar Ball look like he’s out a little too far over he’s over his skis,” but sure — you were thinking about how it was going to affect your Monday morning appearance on First Take. Cool.

How about your incessant bragging on behalf of both your son and yourself? Do you think it gives his opponents added motivation? How do you feel that your words may encourage other players to trash talk your son?

“Ain’t nobody worried about that, they wanna play against me.”

Hmm, alright.

If anyone is looking for an explanation as to why Lonzo permanently wears the face of a PTSD sufferer, just imagine spending your entire life having to sit through experiences like this…

Jake O'Donnell

Jake was hatched from a large egg in 1999, fully formed. His hobbies include sports, writing, and accumulating hobbies. He considers his body is a temple. A very oddly shaped temple. (@_jakeodonnell)