Dear Wichita State, Please Explain The Real Meaning Behind ‘The Shockers’ So We Can Stop Making Dane Cook Jokes

  • Jake O'Donnell

One in the final four, and none in the stink: Shockers are people who harvest wheat, apparently. “Shocking” is the process of harvesting wheat, whereby a “shocker” would put the severed stalks in bundles. Wichita is in Kansas. Kansas has a lot of wheat to harvest. That being said, what the hell is with the mascot? Is it a stalk of wheat or a partially exploded Polly-O string cheese? Why does it look like an angry Rastafarian Bart Simpson? Wikipedia, activate explanation!

In 2006 it was decided to once again update the Wu costume. The general consensus was that many wanted the costume to more accurately reflect the depiction of WU in the school’s logo. The new WuShock now has the ability to run, jump, and walk up stairs without help.

Ok, so it can run up stairs without help. Great. That just sounds like they hired a much more able-bodied person to put in the costume. Why isn’t it a farmer? Farmers can be intimidating AND run up and down stairs with ease! Instead, WU uses a “shock” of wheat. All it needs to do is sway occasionally. Or be bundled. So, Wichita are “The Shockers” (derived from Wheatshockers) but their mascot is “a shock of wheat.” Ugh. Here’s a shocking video of shocking on video (ironic, because it’s about the most boring thing one could imagine.)

Whatever the hell it is, it’s going to be running up and down a lot of stairs at the football specific massive arena that is the Georgia Dome for the Final Four.

UPDATE, 2015:

Now: The Shocker beefs with Chris Webber after C-Webb calls him “angry SpongeBob.”

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Jake O'Donnell

Jake was hatched from a large egg in 1999, fully formed. His hobbies include sports, writing, and accumulating hobbies. He considers his body is a temple. A very oddly shaped temple. (@_jakeodonnell)