Paul Ryan Gave A Motivational Speech To The Miami (Ohio) Football Team, So They Lost 56-10 To Ohio State

  • Dylan Murphy

Paul Ryan graduated from Miami University in Oxford, Ohio in 1992. He’s running on the Republican ticket as Mitt Romney’s vice president. You may or may not know this already. You also may or may not know that he’s a really fast sort of marathon runner.

Before yesterday’s in-state football showdown between Miami (Ohio) and Ohio State, Ryan had the opportunity to fire up the troops before battle. And so he did, sort of.

He’s a little awkward and clunky, though we’ll give him a pass since he’s not a spit-blathering football coach, but a politician with speech writers. Then again, his alma mater did proceed to get absolutely crushed (56-10), so there’s that. He also mentions that Ohio State hasn’t defeated an in-state team in 100 years, which, well, is false. Maybe he means, you know, his school. But the worst is left for the end, when he tells the team to “make it…[awkward pause]…count.”

While we understand the team bringing in Ryan to honor the VP candidate and give a moment to remember for their players, what if most of the people in the room were, uh, voting for the other guys?

h/t Cosby Sweaters